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Wednesday, 1 February 2017

Finding Purpose in Prison

          

Can the prison experience be good? Inmates are crammed into small cells or overcrowded dorms like sardines, surrounded by some of the most difficult personalities on the planet, and ordered around by self - righteous, often power hungry and abusive authority figures. The cramped living quarters are physically and emotionally uncomfortable. The lack of privacy is exhausting, and the empty nature of prison friendships is socially unfulfilling. The boredom is mind - numbing. The loneliness can be crushing, and the inflexible power inbeds anger into one's personality. The incarcerated person is completely isolated from loved ones - few things hurt more than knowing your friends and family have moved on without you. Perhaps the hardest pill to swallow, however, is knowing this is all self - inflicted. After all, if you admit it's your fault, you are then responsible. 
   There is no escaping the fact that I am responsible for an incredible amount of devastation. I've brought suffering to my victim , my family, and myself and I cannot move forward with my life until I acknowledge that. But when I finally realize I am the problem, something miraculous happens: I also realize I can do something about the problem. I find purpose. The time I'm serving in prison becomes an opportunity to change how I view the world, how I treat others, and how I meet my needs. However, I cannot accomplish that on my own. I need God's help. But if I'm committed to learning how to become a better man, God has promised to help. "And we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." (Rom.8:28) 
   God is interested in transforming me into an instrument of light, and He will use the difficult experiences of incarceration to bring about changes in me that I cannot completely understand. But I've got to do my part. I've got to live like I believe it. How I view my situation will determine how I live while I'm here. I am not the victim. The selfishness of my past put me here. But if the selfish deeds of my past led to my present incarceration, what might my present positive actions lead to in the future... if I give my present to Him... on purpose? 

Eric Burnham #12729124
2500 Westgate 
Pendleton, OR 97801

Education Matters

                 

   My name is Eric Burnham, but these days I'm better known as inmate #12729124. I grew up in a low-income, single-mother home. Nobody in my family had ever graduated from high school, so any thoughts of college were " what if " dreams. 
   As a young teenager, I arrived at the conclusion that there was a ceiling over my life. Whether for socioeconomic reasons, psychosocial stumbling blocks, or poor lifestyle choices ( perhaps a combination of all three ), I had come to accept the idea that there were just some things in life I would not be able to do. Getting a college degree was one of those things, and once a person identifies something as unattainable, steps to get it are considered to be a waste of time. 
   Consequently, when I was 15, I dropped out of school - a dysfunctional family situation made my poor choices much easier. I was messed up inside, and I self - medicated with lots of alcohol, drugs and consensual sex. I completely embraced a criminal lifestyle. I didn't really care how I was living as long as I was numb. 
   During adolescence, the belief that I was incapable, and therefore undeserving, of anything better became a firm fixture within my self - concept. I was deteriorating fast, and the culmination of my poor choices was a life sentence in prison. I was 21- years - old. I take full responsibility for the carnage of my past. I am deeply ashamed of who I used to be. 
   When I arrived at E.O.C.I. in 2001, not only did I not have a high school diploma or G.E.D. , but due to my substance abuse during adolescence, I was emotionally underdeveloped as well. While I was initially assigned to the G.E.D. program, within two weeks I dropped out, and about a month later, I was placed in disciplinary segregation for fighting. 
   While in segregation, I began to realize I was worth more than the way I had been living. I wanted something different for my future, or I knew I would die in prison. I just didn't know how to change. I did know, however, that getting back into the G.E.D. program was a good place to start. I earned my G.E.D.  within six weeks, and I felt like a new person. Earning my G.E.D. showed me I was capable of success, and that was empowering beyond description.
   I began to question my involvement with gangs, and drugs, and other refacIOuS activities. I wanted more. I had begun to view myself as worthy of more. I didn't know what to do, and I didn't really know what made me tick, so to speak. It was at that point in my life an opportunity to earn college credit via correspondence course format became available to me. 
   Since I was enrolled in college courses, clear conduct was - and still is - required in order for the Education Department to proctor my tests. I realized I needed to stay away certain people and activities that could negatively influence me or jeopardize my education. My lifestyle mattered to me for the first time in my entire life. I freely admit I was scared; I didn't know how I was supposed to feel or how I was supposed to act. All I knew was that I wanted an education, and I didn't want to let down the people who were supporting me. They believed in me, and nobody had ever believed in me like that before.
   Staying out of trouble for a greater purpose than simply avoiding negative consequences is habit forming. I haven't been to segregation since I began my pursuit of a college education. In 2015 I graduated Summa Cum Laude ( 3.98 GPA ) with a Bachelor of Arts in Counseling, and by mid 2017, I will graduate with a Master's degree in Counseling.
   For me, education has been my catalyst for change. The investment I have made in myself and my future has had an enormous impact on my self - concept, my worldview, and my decision - making process. Ironically, even though I'm still incarcerated, my education has provided me with a greater sense of freedom, purpose, and self - assurance than I have ever known. When I'm released from prison, I'll be pursuing a career, not looking for a job. I'll be able to use the knowledge and experience God has given me to help others who are struggling.
   If you have a loved one in prison, one of the best things you can do for him or her is help with education. They can use any help you'd be willing to provide. Education is vital in today's high - tech, fast - paced society. Inmates releasing back into society already have a black mark against them because of the felonies that haunt them. They don't necessarily need a college degree - college courses, vocational training, or keen some anger management or emotional intelligence classes can significantly help. According to the Journal of Correctional Education, 75% of college educated inmates find stable employment upon release, and they have 43% lower odds of future incarceration. Education can literally change an inmate's life. I know it changed mine.

Eric Burnham #12729124
2500 Westgate
Pendleton, OR 97801

Thursday, 19 January 2017

Bio



 About Me

    My name is Eric Shawn Burnham. I was born April 21, 1979, in Las Vegas, Nevada, but I grew up mostly in Oregon and California. I came to prison in 2001, and I've been at E.O.C.I. ever since.
    When I was 21, I confronted another man while intoxicated. During the fight, I stabbed him, and I unfortunately took his life. I was a heavy alcohol and drug user throughout my adolescence and young adulthood. I deeply regret the actions of my youth, but I'm not the same person I was back then. I cannot change the past, but I can use it to shape my future.
    I intend to dedicate the rest of my life to helping young people avoid making the same mistakes I did. I earned my G.E.D. in 2003, and in 2015, I earned a Bachelor of Arts in Counseling, graduating with a 3.98 GPA. By mid - 2017, I will have earned a Master's degree in Counseling, and I'm accumulating CEU  credits in order to meet the requirements for state certification as an alcohol and drug counselor. ( I will also need 4000 hrs of clinically - supervised Counseling that I cannot achieve until I'm released. )
   I work as a tutor in the G.E.D. program here at the prison, and I love my job. It doesn't pay much, but it gives me an opportunity to help young people.
   Personal growth, to me, means becoming the person I was designed to be. I'm not entirely sure where the balance is found between nature and nurture in the formation of my spirit as a unique human being. I do know, however, that I'm just one incarcerated man trying to overcome his past mistakes and make a positive impact on this crazy world. I kind of think that's what life is all about: taking the bad and using it for the good.